Anger- Day Three

 ^“A gentle answer turns away wrath,
       but a harsh word stirs up anger.”  Proverbs 15:1 NIV

Adversaries. Where once a couple had stood, now stood opponents. How do you battle without losing sight of the goal-- to end the war? To reach a peace treaty with as little blood shed as possible? You need a cool calm spirit. You need a gentle spirit. You need the Holy Spirit. During the first year of my divorce I felt the voice of the Spirit whisper to me “Be Still” and “Trust me.” Repeatedly. Only those words.

When David and I would meet to discuss dividing money, belongings, I needed that calm Spirit, that guiding influence. It would have been too easy to accuse, judge, argue, threaten and curse at him. And it would have stirred up his “anger” as the verse above says. Then we would have needed lawyers to talk for us, although sometimes they are necessary because of various legal matters.

Those whispers into my spirit were like invisible cloaks I could slip on and disappear for awhile. It allowed me to be present, yet not to overreact or act emotionally until later in the safety of my bed or with a friend to protect me. I did not always feel God meet me there, but you and I both know that our feelings are tricky and can’t be trusted. The valley of divorce makes steps of faith feel like you are moving five hundred pound weights attached to your feet. Yet those steps are needed if we are going to cross this valley without becoming bitter old crones.

Practical steps: Memorize a verse or two about the Holy Spirit that you can use to calm yourself when meeting with the soon-to-be ex spouse. Or write them on an index card you can pull out of your pocket or purse at anytime. 

Your thoughts: ________________________________________________

^“But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.” John 14:26 NIV